My biggest surprise about getting rich? Know the problems of being Rich and wealthy

Most people hold the illusion that if only they had more money, their life would have been better and they would be happier. Then they get rich, and that doesn’t happen, and it can throw them into a serious life crisis. If you’re part of the middle class, you have just as many opportunities to do with your life what you want of it. If you’re not happy now, neither will you be happy because of money.

Money

First, one of the only real things being rich gives you is that you don’t have to worry about money as much anymore.  There is only a certain amount of money that any man needs to live a happy and comfortable life. More than that, anything that he has is just for show.  Most people don’t realize this until they actually experience it.

Read the experience (positive and negative) of people who got rich (sudden or with struggle)

Negative Side:

  • You are not allowed to complain about anything, ever. You can’t really complain about your problems except within your small circle of rich friends.  Even if you do, non-rich people can’t really empathize with you.
  • Does this person really just want to be my friend? Most people now want something out of you, and it can be harder to figure out whether someone is being nice to you because they like you, or they are being nice to you because of your money.

People stick around you for money all the time. Your immediate family, your extended family, your distant family, friends, acquaintances, even random strangers… Everywhere you go, people are giving hints that you should pay for something they want. It brings a lot of fake people into your life, people that want to be your friend or associate with you just because of what you can do for them or give them or because of your money.

They might come and ask you for a loan (bad idea: if you give, always give a gift). One common problem is that they don’t appreciate the presents the way that they used to, and they can have unrealistic expectations for how large a present should be and be disappointed when you don’t meet their unrealistic expectations.  This will lead to sour relationships and relationships get harder.

You will have friends and relative’s abundant love and care not because of your nature and humbleness but because of your money. Your good old friends suddenly start looking for ways to suck some juice.

  • You sometimes lay awake at night, wondering if you made the right investment decisions, whether it might all go away. In other words, worries don’t go away with lots of money, they just change.  There is always something to worry about.

           

  • You can start to feel a certain sense of isolation. You find it impossible to connect with ordinary middle class people. With money comes loneliness which is the worst part of it.

It may be counter-intuitive because one would think a rich person can always throw a party or go to one. But what about a Monday morning? If you don’t have to work, where do you go on a Monday? If you don’t need to go to school to drop kids, if you don’t shop at the grocery store, and so on?

In addition, when you don’t work because you are rich but can’t hang out with your friends who have to work during the week, you feel like an outcast in the society.

I had loved working to build my business; the people, the excitement of the developments, getting my hands dirty and actually achieving something. Now it no more exists.

  • The next thing you need to understand about money is this: all of the things you picture buying, they are only worthwhile to you because you cannot afford them (or have to work really hard to acquire them). Maybe you have your eye on a new Benz car- once you can easily afford it, it just doesn’t mean as much to you anymore.

The first month you drive the Benz car, or eat in a fancy restaurant, you really enjoy it. But then you sort of get used to it. And then you are looking towards the next thing, the next level up. And the problem is that you have reset your expectations, and everything below that level doesn’t get you quite as excited anymore.

 You start to lack appreciation of all what you have “It’s another day for you and me in paradise.” You become angry that your Armani suit didn’t come in the shade of color you wanted, yet you forget your fellow human being starved to death minutes ago.

  • It is stressful to manage money and the more you have of it, the more complex the task becomes and the more afraid you are of losing that money.

I used to think that the rich work less. They just sit there doing nothing all day. Which is really not the case. They work much more because they value their time much more. Because of this, they will not want to waste a minute.

  • You will start to find fault even in a Ferrari saying that either they are badly made with a really crappy layout or finish
  • Many people assume that rich life is a piece of cake, even if it’s not. Maybe someone in the family just died, maybe you’re on the verge of divorce, maybe your job or business is tanking, may be your kids are turning into brats… Wealth doesn’t solve everything.
  • There are a few problems associated with being rich such as general lack of motivation for work, family/friends asking for money, worry for how to motivate kids, spouse with different attitudes toward life after getting rich, potential spouse being a gold digger, unexpected jealous reaction from friends/family, pressure to deal with more complex tax, estate planning and investment planning and etc.
  • You can afford everything but you cannot find happiness.
  • Life is still tough. Even with all the money at my disposal, I can’t buy back a single second of the time I wasted acquiring it.No amount of money helps mend the past.

All my money can’t buy me more time or energy to devote to a relationship, or to travel, or to any of the other experiences that can help contribute to happiness.

  • After getting all the crap you ever wanted in the past, you either get addicted to materialism (just buying stuff for the sake of buying) or you get completely bored of it and stop spending money on things.
  • Am I healthy enough? Wealthy people get sick, have interpersonal problems and get in car accidents.
    The biggest surprise about getting rich is that money does not and will never solve all your problems, and sometimes creates additional ones that you didn’t have before.
  • Even had some friends talk about how wealthy I was but was not spending it. They see me not working, and feel the need to make snarky remarks. People all of a sudden start counting your money.
  • Rich are fearful. A better class of criminal can always target them.
  • Rich do very boring conversations. It mostly involves more money making and sometimes talk of real estate, brands and show offs…
  • Since everyone is rich in your circle no one is rich. Therefore you again find that you are not rich enough.
  • Children and Spouse start to abuse hard earned money on alcohol, drugs and parties.

Positive Side:

Money

  • Your quality of life becomes infinitely better when you have lot of health and passive income.
  • Most expenses can be made without thinking about what it costs. This is definitely better, without a doubt.
  • Financial independence is where the process of becoming rich begins. That was the moment I stopped worrying and relaxed. This frees your mind up for doing creative things which will help the society.
  • You never have to worry about income and expenses anymore. You can buy anything you need (not wants) to lead a comfortable life. You understand that when you have a financial emergency, medical expenses, and kids’ education you have access to the necessary cash to pay for it, without any stress or worry.
  • The first feeling was that of freedom. I was free, independent, and no longer had to live any part of my life at someone else’s beck and call. I was able to do whatsoever I pleased whenever I chose: travel, read, study, be a sloth, and no one could compel me otherwise.
  • It secures your future.
  • You become a very influential person in the society. If you are starting a new business, a new trust/foundation, an educational institution. It is very easy to pull the right strings and get things done. You have a huge leverage in influencing people.

 

Conclusion:

Whether you’re rich or not, make your life what you want it to be, and don’t use money as an excuse. Get out and involve yourself and stay active in the outside world, pursue your passion, and make a difference.

Many people who have become a millionaire have worked too hard to become rich and they thought that all their problems would be solved. Then they found out that money didn’t solve their problems and then they think as to what was the point in sacrificing so many important things to come this far where they have lost all those important things like love, friendship, family etc that really matters in every human beings life.

Sit yourself down and try to understand your needs, save for a rainy day but do not hoard. Money is an excellent medium to pursue self-growth. Use it for that instead of stashing it in a bank thinking that it will help in case your children can’t build a good life for themselves.

Learn to be productive while enjoying your youth as MUCH as possible. Time is such an important commodity, you truly have absolutely NO idea of its actual value until you have such little left.

 

Rich is again a relative term. If I compare myself with bill gates I am very poor. If I compare myself with poor people I am extremely rich. Money definitely takes away few portion of stress but it will definitely not solve every problem in relationships and illness. You can’t conceive a baby with money, you can’t find true love with money, and you also can’t stop death entirely from money.

Make happiness your goal and practice a positive state of mind, then money will follow you.

Image credit: Flickr


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